There is likely no person in the world who has never made what they consider a “bad decision.” You are never alone; the worst thing to do in these moments is to isolate yourself from your support system. During these difficult times, it seems like the world is closing in on you, and you prefer to be alone. But the desire to be alone will likely break you. Your isolation gives you more time to rehearse the “bad decision” and further deepens your despair.
Your support system has a network of people who collectively offer or represent more than emotional support. Your support system is also a hub for meaningful human relationships. So while it is admirable to stand on your own, it is equally important to recognize your support system is a strength. The type of strength that keeps you grounded and provides a sense of security and belonging that would be absent during your self-imposed isolation.
You will feel what you feel, and the support system cannot relieve you of all your feelings. However, the members of your support system can embrace you with unconditional positive regard by facilitating your recovery as you improve your adaptive functioning. As your functioning improves, you will return to practicing positive self-regard. Your support system is an invaluable asset with a peculiar quality you realize when you need strength to persevere.
We choose everything we do from two or more alternatives. Interestingly, we have copious amounts of experience making decisions and sometimes forget some decisions are clear-cut. Others are complicated by known and unknown variables. For example, you invest your psychological energy into second-guessing your decision that did not pan out as anticipated. It is not uncommon to find yourself in situations where you use the benefit of hindsight to question your judgment. For better or worse, when we make decisions, we do not make the decisions to fail. Instead, we make decisions with the information available to us at the time.
You can only sometimes know how a decision will unfold; therefore, you should not selectively recall portions of the decision that suits the current narrative. Decisions are neither good nor bad; they teach lessons you would not otherwise learn. Beyond selectively remembering acceptable parts of the decision is attributing unrelated information to the outcome and thinking of the world as predictable. If the world were predictable, there would be no need to make adjustments to our previous decisions.
Stay Naturally Curious