Hi, How Are You?

I imagine there are many things we do instinctively without ever considering why we do them. One such thing is the way we greet each other. Of course, we usually greet each other in a friendly and polite manner. Hence, the greeting and question, "Hi, how are you?"

There are several variations to how we initiate the question. The question is helpful for casual and formal conversation. For example, an email's formal version may sound like, "I hope all is well with you." The casual version with a friend is, "How are things going?" Or "What's good?"

It helps the other person relax and gives the impression that the asker is genuinely interested in their answer. It is really a cornerstone for small talk and initiating conversations.

The question is like the greetings and salutations we were encouraged to use in our letter writing; I just aged myself. Letter writing is probably no longer a thing since we labeled it "snail mail." We now have more suitable means of communication, such as through emails and text messages, which are sometimes informal. We may even reply with emojis. My daughters often respond to How are you with a thumbs-up emoji; it used to drive me crazy.

I, too, take the question for granted, and I tend to salute people as I walk by. Yes, the salute is an acknowledgment. Still, I should have done better in responding to the question and having the opportunity to check in with people.

The question, "How are you?" is quite ambiguous. Do you respond without the usual script of "I'm fine, thank you  for asking." I can see how a person would give a scripted answer to this question. It isn't easy to ascertain if the question is a genuine inquiry or a cursory, polite thing to say without consideration for how the other person feels and what is happening in their life.

I am even curious if the person being asked, "How are you?" cares about the question, let alone the answer they are giving. I often wonder if hearing the question means anything to the person and if they are confused about how to respond. Do we even know what we want to hear?

Many times, we ask the question in passing without stopping to engage. I know there are moments when you will not have the time for an in-depth conversation or to listen to the other person. Still, I think it would mean a lot to attach meaning to the question.

Empower Minds. Inspiring Lives.