I wish life were simple; it probably is simple, but the depth and meaning we ascribe to our experiences dictate our trajectory. Furthermore, sacrifices that erode pieces of us leave us foundationally weakened. We must know when to move on.
I do not know who to give credit for the phrase, "Experience is the best teacher." Still, kudos to the person who left us with this most insightful phrase. We have often drawn attention to the past without fully appreciating it is fundamental to who we present ourselves to be. The situations we grew up in or lived through are not self-defining. This realization may not be all that revealing. Still, we should consider how many of us are determined to outrun our past experiences.
The reasons we want to outrun our past experiences naturally vary from person to person. Try as we may; the past is no different from our shadow; it follows us wherever we go. We probably shouldn't overlook the purpose of striving for power and control over our lives and circumstances. Therefore, when we stand up to assert ourselves, we should do so with the complete understanding our purpose is not to rewrite our history or make someone pay for slighting us. Our mission is to reemerge prepared to grow.
We sometimes confuse self-control with taking a stance against external control. In reality, self-control is learning how external control influences our decision-making, not only about ourselves but how we want others to see us. Therefore, we must learn to manage our emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. The way we remember things is not always accurate. We tend to frame our slights in ways that drive single-mindedness since we must show we've excelled despite our circumstances.
In the 48 Laws of Power, Robert Greene writes, "Do not build a fortress to protect yourself; isolation is dangerous." Therefore, remember that maintaining healthy relationships is crucial to your progress.
Our past experiences shouldn't create feelings of an inferiority complex within us, but sometimes they do. The inferiority complex will have us behaving in unhealthy ways in relationships. As individuals, we sometimes thrive on external compliments; as such, we sometimes forget to give ourselves the grace to grow and appreciate ourselves. More importantly, one-sided relationships must stop; when you overcommit to a relationship and it's not reciprocated, you must recognize that it's not the other person. It would be best to evaluate what you are doing and why.Â
Let "Experience be your best teacher."
Empowering Minds. Inspiring Lives.